How to Choose a New Church & Avoid The Stress of Transition
June 19, 2011 by Admin
Filed under Church, Ministry Updates
After service on Sunday, June 12, 2011, news reports rang out when Atlanta Pastor, Dr. Creflo Dollar encouraged any visitors who had left New Birth Missionary Baptist Church, and were considering joining the ministry he leads (World Changers) to go back where they came from. “If you’re from that church,†said Pastor Dollar, “and you trying to join here, I don’t want you to join here.†Click HERE to view Video of Dr. Dollar\'s Message
The truth of the matter is, leaving a church is painful. It means leaving friends and dissolving relationships—which is never easy. It also means experiencing a deep sense of disappointment, especially in the wake of scandal.
The “tradition†of church membership used to include generational as well as unconditional allegiance—in other words, the church of your grandparents and parents became your church—for better or worse—until death, and Jesus, claimed you. These days, that’s changing. New moves in church leadership, whether driven by scandal or changes in philosophy, have caused many to take flight and seek another place to worship, or even, multiple places to worship (see this month’s Gospel Today, “Gatekeepers†article by Dr. Sam Chand). Of course, there’s also the mobility many people experience due to job relocations. All in all, finding a new place of worship can be extremely stressful.
If you are in transition and looking for a new house of worship, here are some guidelines:
1. Leave prayerfully. Never leave a church because you are upset, frustrated or “hurt†by the actions (or inactions) of others. If you decide to leave, do so prayerfully and carefully, recognizing that even though your season of fellowship there has ended, that God’s ability to use that ministry to bless others is not over.
2. Leave honorably. Don’t gossip about the church you just left. Acknowledge that God hears your conversation, knows your motives and will hold you accountable for what you do, and just as importantly, how you do it.
3. Leave graciously. Be mature about your choice. Realize that a perfect church will never be found this side of eternity; so get used to going to an imperfect fellowship. Look for ways to allow your membership to bless your church members and leaders as opposed to looking to “be†blessed.
4. Leave thankfully. If at all possible, have an exit interview with one of the leaders, elders, or pastors of the church you are leaving. Explain the reasons for your departure, express your gratitude for their hard work, and commit yourself to praying for the church with which you will no longer be associated.
(Notes on Church membership
The Bible speaks of our being members of one another (Romans 12:4-5). We are joined together in Christ (Ephesians 4:15-16). We eat from one loaf and drink from one cup (Ephesians 4:4-5). We are to carry one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2). We might even find ourselves selling our property in order to meet another’s needs (Acts 4:32ff.). We are to be a forgiving community (Colossians 3:13) that is deeply in love with one another (John 13:34). The church is a precious gift to God’s people. Christ died to bring the church into being (Ephesians 5:25)! The church is the mantelpiece of God, the display of God’s splendor before the angels (Ephesians 3:10)! So let us take care that we cherish the organism that Christ suffered to create—and may God bless his church!
What do you think? Have you ever left a church? Blog about it here!
Amen, well said and this are the steps I’ve taken and truly I can say when you are in order with the Word and with your Church All things will work together for your good, it’s never easy to leave any relationship weather good or in difference, when you’re connected with the body we are to be as one, so no matter where you may transition to you are still connected to one another. But you must choose to leave in Love, with your fellow worshippers.I thank God I am still connected in Prayer, Fellowship with the Pastors, Teachers of my old Church. I knowing that we are all one body with many members, no matter what Church you attend we should all be one body and feel one anothers infirmities. So for Pastor Creflo Dollar not to except the members is a little too much, I think they should have counseling before joining, but not turn them away. For Our Father will leave the flock to save even one sheep. It’s Not About Us, It’t All About JESUS.
Wow.. I can not belive Pastor Dollar
DR. Creflo Dollar & his Wife are Mentors of ours. We think he has much Integrity. We feel he just dont want People coming to his Church wrong.. There are few People Like them as Pastors. We just love to sat & listen to Him & His Wife Teachings & His Wisdom. Have been busy lately Rebuilding Our Ministry but Plan to spend more time there for Our Time Of Rest as a Pastor & to give more from Our Church to his Ministry so we can get that type of Harvest On Them & There Ministry,
Lynn, I believe that Dr. Dollar’s reason for telling Bishop Long’s members not to join his church is in support of Bishop Long and his congregation. It’s not sound to leave a church based on an emotional whim. I believe that the members of New Birth should have all the facts of Bishop Long’s case before they just up and decide to leave his church. Also, if a church does decide to welcome new members, that church has to make adjustments as far as fiscal responsibilities, as well as other considerations, i.e., denominational beliefs, etc. No one who may be looking to join a new church should do so before finding out about the denomination’s doctrine and beliefs. Transitioning to a new church requires that some homework gets done by the person looking to relocate to a new church home!!
I truly agree with the rules of leaving one church to join another! One must be Prayerful about the decision and now and days you can not/ should not make that transition quickly! Changing churches is especially hard for those that have been charged with a calling/position in the church! Many believe you stay in place but what happens when God tells you He has need of you somewhere else? You leave! I went from one local church where I was obedient, and did what the pastor would have me to do, just to not be used but I still learned something from that season and in return God moved us to where we are now and God has put me to work and I have been able to be a key place to help the church/ministry be effective in this dying World! The thing that really set my family from others is we had a meeting with the Pastor and left the right way so there would be no shame! So when that church visits our church or vice versa I have nothing to fear for we left the right way and joined the other church the right way! Just now that transition is difficult but in order to be successful and effective where you move to you must leave that which you left the right way! To God be the Glory!
My question to Pastor Dollar.. (who has one of the best word ministry I’ve hear for a minute now).. but what if God told those members to join your church? So as the pastor he didn’t want them too.. what then Pastor Dollar?
All very good viewpoints. I’m not a member of New Birth nor World Changers, however, I’m not surprised by the statements. You don’t move unless God moves you. He won’t move you in mess but out of mess. Many people who I have spoke with leaving New Birth have not done so with the right motives in mind. Many are all about tha man in the church but not the MAN OF THE CHURCH (Christ). I see it as a marriage, you don’t get a divorce because you have rocky times. I’m not from the south and I find the traditions as they relate to the church interesting. I moved from my church of 6 years because GOD was sending me to ministry to the unsaved in the streets, homeless and women’s battered shelters. I spoke with my Pastor and some of the leadership a year prior to the move. Oddly enough, my move took place before the pastor announced that God was moving him to another church but he was leaving the church that he helped build in the hands of a Godly replacement. The relationships in which I built in that church dissolved and I was more disappointed with the leadership’s handling of the move. Some of the women leaders who walked the cancer journey with me stop communicating with me even though I continued to stay in touch with them. I was hurt by that but received a message while going through the cancer journey from the Holy Spirit that some would be with me for a season and some for a reason. When I came to drink that message, I began to feel better (personally) and realized that it wasn’t about me but about the traditions in a church. I say all of this to say, all of this shall pass. Everyone will stop feeling as though they have to run. Stay and build what you as christians began; focus on God and the message He has for each of you. Stand your ground on solid foundation and God will see the church through it. To God Be the Glory!
The problem with transitioning ministries, is the lack of spiritual development. When God assigns you a pastor, you have to know that you have completed your development under that ministry. The scripture says, (paraphrasing) “obey them that have rule over you as they must give account for your soul; that they may do it with joy and not with grief, for this is unprofitable for you.” People are switching ministries without ever learning submission, humility, servitude or most importantly, the spirit of obedience. I think that needs to be included as one of the elements of exiting a ministry….make sure you’ve submitted yourself to your leader that they are able to speak well of you, wherever you might go. Even if there’s conflict between leadership and members, the scripture says, “A man that pleaseth God, maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him.”
This is one of the best articles ever written. I wish something like this would have been written years ago.
It is time for the body of Christ to reflect his true nature. We should not be in a civil war. It should not exist. I am so wanting the kingdom of God (God’s ways) to be reflected in us who are Christ’ s body… thank you Dr. Dollar
This was a good article. My previous Pastor sent it to me. Someone should write an article on how the Cleric should respond when a member of his or her congregation leaves…
Years ago there was a mass exodus from a nearby (like faith) church where the pastor was exposed in scandal. A multitude of members all of a sudden began attending our church… it took about 2 weeks before MOST of them began making subtle demands (in agreeing clusters) on changes that “should or could” be made within our church based on what they had been accustomed to at their church. Worship leaders, auxillary heads, business men and women… you name it, “errbody” had a revelation on how to “make it better”. The leadership of our church crumbled under the division and pressure. Within 3 years the church dismantled. I understand Pastor Dollar’s message.
dont think Bishop Long members should go to DR Creflo DOllar Church, DR CREflo no disrespect but he have a ankle anointing ministry,Bishop Long has a knee dip anointing so DR Dollar ministry would not be the Church for most of Bishop Long members no way.you go where you are be fed where GoD speaks to you bout you this brings about devine change,transformation in Christ Jesus.
OMG! what is going on with the body of Christ? How dare Creflo Dollar say that? There are so many churches that deceive now it is not funny! I left my church because of hurt and I am glad that I did. My pastor saw the problems that were going on with my family, people not speaking in the sanctuary and are supposed to be blood family, and he did not intervene! I never gave him a love offering because of my financial status, and when I left, he begged my mom to come back because she gave large sums of money… he told me at the age of 19, God speed! Why would any sane individual stay in that kind of ministry…. God will make things come to light so you can make an intelligent decision for your self… Me and My mother could smell the rigormortis settle in from dying spiritually in that ministry…. when you go to church and it becomes a chore, or you are trying to punch a clock, IT IS TIME TO GO! We came in and left with more stress on our shoulders.. When people are hurt by another ministry, churches should embrace them and not display the same ignorance that they left! The great falling away that is in the Bible, is that going to be the fault of the administration and leadership of the Church.. hmmm, that makes you think?
Now is the time for all Christians to seek Wisdom. We are getting so caught up in how the world handles things, that we are forgetting the truth! Pastor Dollar has said on more than one occasion that people who run to his church from other churches need to go back. First off, he is just a yielded vessel being used by God, and God has equipped him for duty. I understand that he has sympathy for Bishop Long, because he has been scrutinized. But he immediately came to the defense with the facts. Telling people to go back where they came from could be interrupted wrong. I think he need to repent and apologize.